This is a collection of quotes that is still growing. If you have any comments on
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This page was filled on September 3, 1999

"If the truth is out there, what's in here?" - Nick Humphries

"I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure." - W.C. Fields

"I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either." - Scott Adams, Dilbert

"Life is like a game of cards. The hand you are dealt with is determinism, the way you play it is free will." - Jawaharial Nehru

"Are you still doing that quote thing?... Are there any quotes in there about dancing monkeys?" - Mike M.

"If you wait to do everything until you're sure it's right, you'll probably never do much of anything." - Win Borden

"I never let my schooling interfere with my education." - Mark Twain

"It is a sin to be silent when it is your duty to protest." - Abraham Lincoln

"Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity." - Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

"A life filled with love may have some thorns, but a life empty of love will have no roses." - Anonymous

"A good part - and definitely the most fun part - of feminism is about frightening men." - Julie Burchill

"Rambo isn't violent. I see Rambo as a philanthropist." - Sylvester Stallone

"I value people with a conscience. It's like a beeper from God." - Robert Orben

"And that's the world in a nutshell - an appropriate receptacle." - Stan Duan

"When one realises his life is worthless he either commits suicide or travels." - Edward Dahlberg

"Our prime purpose in life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them." - Dalai Lama

"You know that every minute you are angry, you waste sixty happy seconds." - Anonymous

"You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly." - Sam Keen

"Don't let my unseriousness make you think it isn't serious." - Phil (anti-road protestor), The Observer January 1997

"Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you mad." - Aldous Huxley

"If you start out depressed everything's kind of a pleasant surprise." - Say Anything

"I think I've discovered the secret of life - you just hang around until you get used to it." - Charles Schulz, Peanuts

"When I think over what I have said, I envy mutes." - Seneca

"The best way to make your dreams come true is to wake up." - Paul Valery

"You can't help my life, but you can hide the knives." - Therapy?

"Why do you have to be a nonconformist like everybody else?" - James Thurber

"Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs." - Lily Tomlin

"We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be." - Kurt Vonnegut, Mother Night

"The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources." - Albert Einstein

"Color me in, whatever mood I'm in." - Crowded House

"What upsets me is not that you lied to me, but that from now on I can no longer believe you." - Frederick Nietzsche

"Sorrow makes us all children again." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"I would remind you that extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice. And let me remind you also that moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue." - Barry Goldwater

"They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself." - Andy Warhol

"Some goals are so worthy, it is glorious even to fail." - Anonymous

"The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible." - Albert Einstein

"So many tangles in life are so ultimately hopeless that we have no appropriate sword other than laughter." - Gordon W. Allport

"You can fight the sleep but not the dream." - Crowded House

"Grant me the courage not to give up what I think is right, even though I think it is hopeless." - Admiral Chester W. Nimntz

"I alone understand you... And you are the only one who understands me. The difference between us is that the darkness that holds you prisoner is inside you." - Goldenrod Kleinman, Englehardt

"No one knows what he can do till he tries." - Publius Syrus

"Integrity is doing the right thing, even if nobody is watching." - Jim Stovall

"Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair." - George Burns

"A leader takes people where they want to go. A great leader takes people where they don't necessarily want to go but ought to be." - Rosalynn Carter

"If you lose the power to laugh, you lose the power to think." - Clarence Darrow

"Fight for your opinions, but do not believe that they contain the whole truth or the only truth." - Charles A. Dana

"Every man I meet is in some way my superior." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"The greatest happienss of life is the conviction that we are loved - loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves." - Victor Hugo

"Many of us will spend the rest of our lives proving ourselves worthy and acceptable to others." - De La Vega

"You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions." - Naguib Mahfouz

"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't." - Erica Jong

"It's innocence when it charms us, ignorance when it doesn't." - Mignon McLaughlin

"Experience is not what happens to you. It's what you do with what happens to you." - Aldous Huxley

"Show me the man you honor, and I will know what kind of man you are." - Thomas Carlyle

"True patriotism hates injustice in its own land more than anywhere else." - Clarence Darrow

"Sometimes a majority simply means that all the fools are on the same side." - Claude McDonald

"Sometimes the fool who rushes in gets the job done." - Al Bernstein

"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts." - Bertrand Russell

"If I can stop one heart from breaking
I shall not live in vain
If I can ease one life the aching
Or cool one pain
Or help one fainting robin
Unto his nest again
I shall not live in vain." - Emily Dickinson

"Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it's compounding a felony." - Robert Benchley

"Now, this is no time for making enemies." - Voltaire (on his death bed in response to a priest asking that he renounce Satan)

"To have one's individuality completely ignored is like being pushed quite out of life - like being blown out as one blows out a light." - Evelyn Scott

"to be nobody-but-myself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make me everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight, and never stop fighting." - e.e. cummings

"If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like I am now." - Jack Handey

"It is well for the heart to be naive and the mind not to be." - Anatole France

"There's one thing worse than being alone: wishing you were." - Bob Steele

"Why grieve because all your dreams have not come true? Neither have all your nightmares." - Unknown

"I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio." - Joan Rivers

"Caroline: You don't really love with your heart, it's just a saying.
Adam: Then why does it hurt so much here when you're not with me?" - Untamed Heart

"Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there, in the room, talking to you, which is why I don't like to read good books." - Jack Handey

"We are in a decaying age. Young people no longer respect their parents. They are rude and impatient. They inhabit taverns and have no self-control." - Inscription on a 6000-year-old Egyptian Tomb

"Life is never easy for those who dream." - Robert James Waller

"My school colors were clear. We used to say, 'I'm not naked, I'm in the band.'" - Steven Wright

"If that's the sort of thing you say to all your ex-boyfriends, no wonder they all go psycho." - friend of mine

"Each friend represents a world in us; a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only in meeting them that a new world is born." - Anais Nin

"Smoking cures weight problems... Eventually..." - Rod Schmidt

"If only there were evil people somewhere, insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?" - Alexander Solzhenitsyn

"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." - Oliver Goldsmith

"Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be, because sooner or later, if you are posing, you will forget the pose, and then where are you?" - Anonymous

"I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then when somebody comes up act like they just woke up and go, 'What was THAT?!'" - Jack Handey

"Factorials were someone's attempt to make math look exciting." - Steven Wright

"Always behave like a duck - keep calm and unruffled on the surface but paddle like the devil underneath." - Jacob Braudie

"True friendship can afford true knowledge. It does not depend on darkness and ignorance." - Henry David Thoreau

"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me.'" - Erma Bombeck

"These people aren't stupid... they're certainly smarter than you are." - Prof. Hacker

"Violence is an admission that one's ideas and goals cannot prevail on their own merits." - Edward M. Kennedy

"Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in daytime and falling into at night." - Edna St. Vincent Millay

"The nature of men is always the same; it is their habits that separate them." - Confucius

"It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them." - Alfred Adler

"If your friend is dead, and being eaten by vultures, I think it's okay to feed some bits of your friend to one of the vultures, to teach him to do some tricks. But ONLY if you're serious about adopting the vulture." - Jack Handey

"The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree." - Steven Wright

"Violence is, essentially, a confession of the ultimate inarticulateness." - Time Magazine

"The earth we abuse and the living thins we kill will, in the end, take their revenge; for in exploiting their presence we are diminishing our future." - Marya Mannes, More in Anger

"Violence is a tool of the ignorant." - Flip Wilson

"Violence represents the worst kind of conformism." - Mario Varga Llosa

"We've all been blessed with God-given talents. Mine just happens to be beating people up." - Sugar Ray Leonard

"I shall allow no man to belittle my soul by making me hate him." - Booker T. Washington

"You never lose by loving, you lose by holding back." - Barbara De Angelis

"A man is not what he thinks he is, but what he thinks, he is." - Jean Paul Sartre

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